You are from Accenture if...

This has been all over my inbox today. Some things are so to the point, they remind of that 80's kid list....

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You are from Accenture if:
- Rex Lallata Jr.
1. You love your company and makes no apologies for it (- Bill Green)
2. You mistake the mall as an extension of your office.
3. Your cubicle is at least within 100 meters radius to the nearest ice tea cooler.
4. Your office is somewhere along the MRT line.
5. You know that roll in roll off is not something you do with the deodorant.
6. You do geek speak like BS7799, SEAKK, ATIS-GDN, x5999.
7. You say ".. it's Confidential" when you don't know the answer.
8. Your body's liquid component is 33% blood, 33% ice tea, and 33% eight o' clock juice. <- kulang ng coffee
9. You also have traces of 'lumot' juice in your body. The City Service says it's green tea. You wonder why the City Service still prepares you that lumot juice when nobody in the world really likes it. You utter distaste by also referring to it as 'sitaw or kangkong punch'. <-haha
10. You take a nap after lunch. You have mastered the talent of snoring without the sound and sleeping with your eyes half open. How ingenious. <- err... di ako natutulog pag lunch
11. You go home late night and grab yourself a burger and coke as dinner at the nearest Mini-Stop or Burger Machine, unaware of those drunk bullies staring at you on the side ( - courtesy of Winston Cruz in one of those People's Hour sessions) <- oh so true...
12. You sit happily in your chair clueless of global warming because the air conditioning is frigging cold. <- truelaloo
13. You don't know Sugar Mercado or Boy Uling. (Sugar, who?)
14. Your fashion perception is limited to wearing black from your waistline down (black toenails included). <- di naman, may blown and gray slacks naman ako...
15. You play basketball in the middle of the night.
16. You watch Prison Break, Grey's Anatomy, 24, CSI or anything that requires a bit of a brain activity.
17. Okay, okay, you also watch American Idol.
18. You go to the gym when everyone's going home. <- haha
19. You are into sports which either be as physical as basketball or hilarious as finger-wrestling with your office mates.
20. You are drowned with abbreviations like SEAAK, WBS, ATIS, PWS etc.
21. You have a compilation of abbreviations either stuck in your memory, stick notes, or saved in a notepad file.
22. Until now, you still have no freaking idea what on earth SEAAK means. <-haha!
23. You know that there is Sunrise even at night, 24 hours a day, six days a week.
24. You do yoga.
25. You don't do yoga, but you still find your best position to sleep on a chair. 26. Your imaginary friend consists of Sy Betty (CBT), Snuffalafagus and Ice Cube.
27. You get Ice Cube from e-mail and not from the fridge.
28. You don't feel that you have a boss.
29. You dial O when you want to order Take Out lunch.
30. You get annoyed when people make noise inside the elevator.
31. You get annoyed when other Accenture employees talk loud inside the elevator.
32. You are relieved when you realized that those talking loud inside the elevators aren't really from Accenture.
33. You sometimes forget that you are from Accenture and you talk loud inside the elevator.
34. You love life.
35. You live love.
36. Your life is love.
37. You think you are smart.You know you are smart.
38. You celebrate Christmas parties 4 times (one with your team, one with the project, one with the Bench people, and one with the whole Accenture) <-ang saya, di ba? :)
39. You know that Bench is not something to warm your butt with, but another endless sessions with CBTs.
40. You forget that Bench is also a shirt and underwear.
41. You know SCRIBO. You define yourself in two words : Best People.
42. You pose for a picture gesturing the Accenture 'V' sign either Korean-style or putting the V behind your friend's head.
43. You discuss something with someone over a conference call and punctuate the conversation with "Get's mo?".
44. You do your work not because you are afraid of your boss but because you don't want to fail your teammates who believe you can do it.
45. You get scared people won't notice when you die because you are stuck at work.
46. You feel you are surrounded with best people.
47. You think everyone is nice, happy and useful. <-useful? ano ba yun...
48. You consider your teammates as the extension of your family.
49. You have at least one Accenture jacket.
50. You have an Accenture bag, Accenture pen, Accenture electric fan, pouch, shirt, or notebook. 51. You wish you have an Accenture fridge, Accenture house, Accenture car and Accenture water dispenser (Ha ha ha).
52. Your secret in cooking comes from the Maya kitchen.
53. You mistake People's Hour as the Yoshinoya hour because of the meals they serve. ( Well sometimes, they also serve Pinoy meals, Thai meals, Value meals, etc.). <-pede ring Max's hour
54. You slouch at your chair like you own the world.
55. You work on Saturdays not because somebody tells you to.
56. You only put off your computer on Fridays. <- minsan pa nga hindi....
57. For security reasons, you wish your head covers the whole of your 17'' monitor. (Maybe, you want to try afro, or inject your head with fluids, or wear headgear the size of planet Earth).
58. You know that someone is from Accenture by simply looking at him. (Yes, it takes one to know one)
59. You enjoy your moments with your family because it's something you can't always afford with the nature of your work.
60. You are trying to go home early to catch you baby awake, but you always end up like that.. trying.
61. You know where to go in cases of fire and emergencies. (To the left, to the left...)
62. You don't know where is your head office (...it's really because you don't have one).
63. You get pissed off when someone pronounces your company as 'acksencha'. You argue that it is pronounced 'ahhhk-sent-yurrrr'. Payn, whatever.
64. You answer yes and no when friends ask you if you work in a call center company.
65. You have to pay P50 just to be able to wear maong on the holidays.
66. You had rewritten science by reformulating E=mc 2: Energy = McDo 2x a day.
67. You go to work and the first thing you do is check your email and try to empty your inbox. 68. Your unkindest remark to your teammate includes "Kelan ka maro-roll off?", which is not even understood by 99.9% of the human race.
69. Most of your jokes is incomprehensible to the average human being and you wonder why. Up to now. <- oi di naman...
70. You are invited to attend your friend's wedding and you ask "When is the Go Live date?" <- ha! so true
71. Your idea of a rockstar is your teammate who knows C and C# coding too well but doesn't even know how to do C minor on the guitar strings.
72. You have the solution on how to save the world. For real. You join community initiatives which sounds somewhere like Piso para sa Pilay, Maong para Makatulong, Tong para Tumulong, Diyes para Sa Buntis. Bente para sa Hinete. This list goes on and on. <-lol!!
73. You live in the fast lane. You live up to the great Latin philosophy 'labore dura et ludus durus' - work hard and play hard. (Well that sounds good in Latin, only that I just made that up. Ha ha)
74. You play 'the-first-one-to-blink-loses' against your computer monitor. It's ok if you get ruptured retinas, you win anyway.
75. You call your boss on a first name basis.
76. Your boss is also referred to in three letters like EMA, BTL, ATI, OMG and the like. (No, GMA is not in the list.)
77. You are working in a project under a shady codename like Project Timbuktu or Team Tickle-UrAnus. This makes your friends upset and suspect you work in an underground network alliance which makes the Yakuzas and Mafias look like smalltime, bluffing sissies.
78. You haven't seen Bill Green in real life and you wonder if he really exists. This puts him in the league with the world's most mysterious characters like the Big Foot, the banker in Deal or No Deal, and Big Brother.
79. You know nobody's blaming you when you get into conversations like 'Sinisi kita kanina sa email ha'. <-hihi
80. You are plotting for world domination.
81. You enjoy a basket of fruits from the 'HR Angels' after your wife do the laboring.
82. Your super heroes include ASLA for money matters and ATIS for everything that requires fixing. Mending of broken hearts not included.
83. You know that ATIS is not always a fruit.
84. Your team lead is your good friend ('Outside the kulambo ka na naman?' ), enemy ('Ha ha ha'), enemy ulit ('Asan na deliverables mo?'), and psychiatrist ('Sige, pagpasensiyahan mo na lang') rolled into one.
85. You know that i-Talk is not a monthly TV program to rival i-Witness. It's a date with your psychologist.
86. You change password every 75 days. You twitch and turn trying to remembers all those passwords that you have. At the end, you call ATIS to reset your password. <- ay sobra... kakainis
87. You are a Bermudian subject (Your company was founded in the Bermuda Triangle, that's why).
88. You play the 'first-one-to-reveal-his-salary-loses' with your team mates. You know that salary information is confidential but you still entice your team mate to divulge his. Those who lose are called 'victims' and they can no longer participate in the game. Currently, you are ranked No. 27in the list and you are up against the No. 1 seed. Like you are playing tennis. <-may naloko na ko nito
89. You are bugged by those annoying credit card companies every hour in your office phone. They suspect you are filthy rich. Maybe filthy, but not rich. <- sobra... mga istorbo
90. You are injected with a tracking pill in your body so that your whereabouts are traced by the company. Until now you don't know about that, do you?
91. But seriously, you are a player in this society. You have high hopes. You have dreams. You have a brilliant mind in working out solutions. You have hopes that this country is worth living after all. You want to develop young minds and contribute in your own little way. This country is failing your expectations but you are still here to give it a shot. You wish people would just work and help themselves out. You are God's little blessing to this country and you know you will help in every way you can to give this country another chance. <- remains true until di ko pa tapos bond ko :P