A Prayer

Dear Lord, I pray for :

Wisdom to understand my man;
Love to forgive him;
And Patience for his moods;
because Lord, if I pray for Strength,
I'll beat him to death.

I got this from one of the forums I frequent. I find it cute :D
Quote not applicaple to me though...(yuck! defensive! LOL)

oh yeah, I remember her

While on our way to KFC I saw one of my highschool classmates. She's one of the popular girls at school-- pretty face, lots of admirers and teacher's pet. We were seatmates for almost 3 years(her surname starts with 'O'), which made us close friends. Gosh, I even remember her asking me to play a part in her talent portion for the beauty pageant she joined in school. Honestly though, it was one of the things I wish I never took part of- it was quite embarassing. Anyways, college happened. We lost touch after a few years of not seeing each other. I don't know what happened to her after our HS graduation though I heard from a friend that she got married... at 18, if I remember correctly.
Seeing her today at the mall looking all pretty and glam made me realize many things. First that came to my mind was- a woman can still look very dalaga-like after having babies (haha).
I also thought about how different we've become. Here I was trying to finish loads of tables, outputs and programs while she was at the mall having a good time.
During our highschool days I had moments when I wish I could be her-- you know, pretty and perfect and all that. But now, I really am happy just the way I am. I would never want to trade places with anyone.

Not wishing to be someone else amidst all the problems has got to be one of the greatest feelings one could have. It makes you count your blessings, lets you think how great your family and friends are, lets you realize how wonderful your significant other is, and gives you this huge smile on your face... :)

amazing...

It is my third day at "work". If had a pack of Sky Flakes, 2 mugs of hot choco and 3 hours of wasted time. Yes, it's already 11am and I still haven't done anything productive (well, other than filling out my time record...)
Will we just sit here all day and do NOTHING? Geez... talk about disappointments. I know the day will come when I wish I could spend the day like this, but man.... this is just way too boring. Not to mention disappointing...

perhaps love...

Today I listened to, in my opinion, the loneliest version of this song. Perfectly matches how I feel right now, in a bittersweet way...
*sigh*

PERHAPS LOVE

Perhaps love is like a resting place
A shelter from the storm
It exists to give you comfort
It is there to keep you warm
And in those times of trouble
When you are most alone
The memory of love will bring you home

Perhaps love is like a window
Perhaps an open door
It invites you to come closer
It wants to show you more
And even if you lose yourself
And don`t know what to do
The memory of love will see you through

Oh, love to some is like a cloud
To some as strong as steel
For some a way of living
For some a way to feel
And some say love is holding on
And some say letting go
And some say love is everything
And some say they don`t know

Perhaps love is like the ocean
Full of conflict, full of pain
Like a fire when it`s cold outside
Or thunder when it rains
If I should live forever
And all my dreams come true
My memories of love will be of you

thank you for the music

Nelly, No Doubt, Justin Timberlake, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Green Day, Smash Mouth...
God bless you for making the music that keeps me awake while I sort hundreds of mails during my shift.

Thanks to Nescafe for keeping my eyes open with their bland-tasting coffee.

Thank you Nissin's for making the most edible ready-to-eat sotanghon ever.

I wish I could say I will miss the nights I spent in this gray, monotonous, cluttered cubicle filled with stuff that aren't even mine.

I will miss though, the barbecued tofu sold near 7-11. I will miss my 2 shiftmates, especially the one to my right, for she has been very friendly to me. :)

i miss you....

been with you yesterday, but i already miss you. i wanna thank you for always being there for me. thank you for putting up with my shortcomings. thank you for being patient. thank you for not staying mad at me.... because i know if i were in your shoes it would take forever for me to accept your apologies. how can you stand my perpetual state of PMS? LOL....
right now i'm just thankful. i will really try to be a better person for you. don't let go of me, ha?
i love you 'by Ü

twenty questions....

when do you say enough is enough?
how do you know it's time to call it quits?
how do you know you've reached your limits, and that the other person simply loves you so he lets things pass?
how can you tell him, "this is not how i want to be loved"?
how do you say that you wish he would just stop doing the things that irritate you?
does he also wish i were a bit different?
how can i tell him that his smoking bugs the shit out of me?
how can i say that i feel i'm giving a lot, and i hope he would also do the same?
how do i let him know i'm sick and tired of financial problems?
is he hiding something from me?
just how important are his accounts to him?
are they more important than i am?
why are the simplest things very hard to give?
why is it that i give everything.... yet i dont feel i even get half in return?
am i not worth it?
is it bad to ask for more?
why do i feel it's unfair for me?
why do i feel i'm the one who always wants sincere affection?
how do i teach myself not to get hurt?
how i do convince myself to just go with the flow?
......

*rant* :'(

i've been up for 22 hours now, and i still have to work (and attend something i don't even want to be part of)... so basically, i have to stay awake for at least 5 hours more.

you know what? it just makes me think.... what do i get out of this? the obvious reasons are: i will get paid, i can get my clearance, and it's a way to stay out of the house. but why am i not happy? i feel like i'm just doing everything i do... just because. wala lang.

i'm feeling a lot of pressure at home so i wanna go out as often and as long as i want. i got a part time job (and i'm happy with what i'm doing there) but in the process, i got overworked. working from 10am-9am is REALLY tiring. do note that i am not yet counting travel time... so yeah....

supposedly i earn more money (i havent received a paycheck from tfi yet) , i spend less time at home and i get more work experience. kaya lang, pagod na ko. it's like an endless cycle. buti na lang sa sabado i get to stay at home to sleep. i do hope nobody wakes me up when i get home. oh wait... may medical pala ako sa sabado. so much for my rest day....

ako rin!

*sigh*

they say people who have these blogs are, in a way, exhibitionists. they want others to know what's going on in their lives in a way that is more.... impersonal. hehe. in a way that you just want to text someone instead of calling him/her, or worse, talking to the person face-to-face. yet, they jot down everything... ironic no?

others say bloggers don't have close friends whom they can confide to. they just type down everything so their hearts can feel a lil lighter after dumping a few words on this online diary.

as for me.... i'm bored. haha. i've been working for like..... 15 hours now. i have 7 more hours to go. shit. for all the weeks that i've been working here, this is the first time i actually sat down and played around. right now i am more concerned with not falling asleep than finishing my work. lately i've had booboos here at work, pati na rin yung iba, but somehow i get affected. parang wala nang nangyaring tama dito sa office na to. hayyyyyyy.

oh, did i mention that some people also set up web logs to whine? that's what i'm doing right now!!!!!!!!!!! :P

sana 9 am na.. miss ko na si mikemike ko!~~~~~~~